Thursday, 13 September 2012

Trying to move on & an outfit post


Thank you so much for your lovely comments on my previous post.
To be honest this week has been unbelievably hard.  Sunday was spent nursing a headache and in tears all day. 
 Monday I went to work but leaving the house was incredibly difficult as I would usually say bye to Tom...I just felt so sick.  I got to the bus stop and burst into tears (luckily there was no one there).  When I got to my desk I literally burst into tears...I was sent home!
  Tuesday was just awful, work told me to take another day off as I felt so upset.  I had feelings of guilt and made myself feel so ill.  
I went back to work yesterday and it was hard but I tried to put on a brave front. 
Today I felt slightly better as I had a chat with the vet who treated Tommy, she assured me I did the best and our decision was the right one.  She explained that he had developed full blown AIDS and that if he had come home with us he would have died a slow painful death as his organs would have shut down one by one.  She said he could have had a blood transfusion but it would have only lasted 24 hours as his red blood cells were just being killed off.  He had severe anemia. I am trying to move on, I knew I would miss Tommy when he went,  but the pain I feel is just unimagineable.
Strangely the only time I feel comfort is at night time as I feel he is with us.  We have his blanket on the bottom of our bed and I just feel him there like a warmth, its hard to explain.  Even when I walk past the bed at night I feel it.  I love him so much and will never ever forget him.
I thought I would try and make a comeback to the blog and thought I would post an outfit I wore last Saturday...this was the day Tommy, rest his soul died.  Little did I know that when I took this photo that sunny Saturday morning my little baby would be leaving us!  I definitely would not have worn such a pretty pink dress otherwise! 

Dress with belt - Internacionale
Sequin floral pumps - Primark

Please excuse what I am doing with my hand....I was tring to move my hair...!

I totally love this bargainous dress.   I bought this after the lovely Charlotte of  recommended it to me as she is saw it on Internacionale's website.  Its amazing how someone you only know from blogging can know you so well.

I had some really good buys at the jumble sale but I shall blog about these at a later date when  I feel more up to it. 
Take care and once again thank you all so much for your kind words.


  1. Aww the dress does look really pretty on you :) glad I suggested well :)

    I understand completely how your feeling with Tommy, yesterday I just couldn't face to get dressed being upset about Cassie. I felt better today, just have to keep myself distracted as its when I think about things I get upset. I also keep thinking I see her curled up out of the corner of my eye before I realise she's not here.

    It will take a lot of getting used to to realise she's not here anymore. My other poor cats are starting to realise she's gone and arent themselves. Our youngest cat (1) was really close to Cassie from being a kitten as Cassie used to wash her and sleep with her so she's been upset since she left and keeps crying.

    Like you said, what you did was the best thing, it's best to go through the heartbreak of losing them than seeing them suffer.

    Sorry for the really long comment, just wanted you to know I completely understand how you feel. Hope your ok, and there's no guilt to feel. You did 100% the best for Thomas. Xx

  2. I'm so sad to hear its so hard for you but thankful that your work are being supportive, and that is a beautiful dress! xx

  3. So sorry to hear about you tom, I've not been on here properely for a while so feel like I've missed out on a lot,

    I know how painful it is to lose a cat, I had to put my down after 18 years, it was one of the hardest things i have ever done, but i felt at peace cuase I knew I'd helped best as I could and there was no suffering.

    I'm sure you gave thomas the best life and you did a good thing for him, no pet wants to suffer.

    They leave such big holes in our lives.
    I have oliver in my living room in a box with a picture, with his ashes, it makes me feel closer to him and he'll always be there.

    sorry to change the subject quickly but i just wanted to add ,that dress looks lovely on you btw, i love the colour/

    "Confessions Of A Small Town Girl"

  4. I am so sorry it is so hard when we lose a pet they mean so much to us!! You look super cute ~Hope your feeling better soon and how nice that your work is being so supportive ~Love Heather

  5. Aww hunny it is so hard when you lose something you love so much. I`m glad that you can feel some comfort on an evening and memories of Tommy will never leave you.
    I love your little dress and shoes and Tommy would have been used to seeing you in your pretty clothes, don`t feel like you need to wear something else. Celebrate Tommy`s life and wear your pretty frocks. Big hugs. Dx

  6. You look lovely. I'm glad you derived some comfort from talking to the vet, it's a terrible decision to have to put a beloved pet to sleep but rest assured that no vet would ever recommend it if there was the slightest chance of saving a life. xxx

  7. My heart really does go out to you hun!!!

    Sal x

  8. I'm so glad the vet was able to help. I completely know what you mean when you say you can feel him with you at night, in many ways he will always be with you.
    Love the dress x

  9. Oh Hun, I am so so sorry to hear of your loss. It must be heart braking for you. I am glad the vet gave you some comfort.

    Sending you loads of hugs.

    X x

  10. Oh Lisa, this post has me in tears right now :( It gets better though, I promise. He will always be with you. Hugs xxx


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